I am a three year member of the Wheeling Park Speech and Debate team. Throughout my time on the team, I have done pretty well for myself. I am a state champion in Program Oral Interpretation, a two-time finalist at our biggest Pittsburgh tournament of the year, and am continuously working towards improving my performance. But this isn’t always motivated through the right reasons.
A fear of failure is something that can be seen in all aspects of life, whether that’s school, extracurriculars, a job, or even in your relationships. But what isn’t addressed nearly as often is the fear of success. For most, it isn’t the success part that is the source of anxiety, but not being able to sustain it. I find that after I get a big win, I hold myself to much higher standards than before. This is because I don’t want to let anyone down by losing, or even embarrass myself by moving backwards. When I accomplish something, I feel that I need to one up that success. The pressure I gain from doing well almost takes away the joy of that achievement.
This is especially relevant in the speech aspect of my life. When I place well with a piece I feel like I must continue to do well with that, or even cut a piece that is even better. The problem with this is the subjectivity in activities such as Speech and Debate. There is no exact scale to determine how good a speech is, and is based on how one person reacted to what you were talking about. This can even be translated to events throughout your life.
When I feel that I’m not being the best that I can I will hyperfixate on improving those aspects of my life, or on the other end I will completely avoid it. It can be difficult when you go from being praised for your success to not meeting those same expectations right after.
In many cases a fear of success sprouts from something called imposter syndrome. According to WebMD, “Imposter syndrome is when you doubt your own skills and successes. You feel you’re not as talented or worthy as others believe, and you’re scared that one day, people will realize that”. This can play a big role in a fear of success, because you may feel as if you don’t deserve the praise.
Though the fear of success can often feel like an endless cycle, there are ways to overcome it. When it comes to a fear of success you can’t go around it, you have to work through it. Giving yourself credit, even when it feels like you don’t deserve it, is important. In addition to this, as cliche as it sounds, it doesn’t matter if you win or lose as long as you are trying your best. Facing failure face on will only help you further improve. On the other hand, if you work hard you deserve the praise that comes with your success.
The best thing that you can do when grappling with a fear of success or imposter syndrome is to recognize your self defeating attitude. I encourage anyone suffering with a similar problem to set time aside to focus on the specific issue that is affecting you. Giving yourself a time limit will not only help you not avoid it, but also assure that you aren’t putting all of your energy into improving that specific area of your life.
